Episode 9: Sips,Laughs and Uhhuh, Mmhm, Yeah, Right

A Day of Drinks, Laughs, and Honest Relationships | April & Cindy's Podcast

In this episode of 'If You Want Me to Be Honest with April and Cindy,' the duo discuss their latest drink, the 'Purple Rain,' made by Scotty. They joke about turning their podcast into an 'alcoholic' show and share personal stories, including an emotional moment about Cindy's mom's birthday and a tribute to recently lost celebrities. They reflect on hair salon adventures, humorous family anecdotes, and Mark’s dermatologist visit. They also offer some lighthearted advice on parenting, stressing that they are not professionals. Tune in for laughs, personal confessions, and plenty of 'uhhuhs,' 'mmhms,' and 'yeah rights.'

00:00 Introduction and Today's Drink

00:58 Remembering Loved Ones

01:51 Celebrity Losses and Coping Mechanisms

02:45 Hair Salon Stories

05:41 Weekend Plans and Anniversaries

12:13 Family Visits and Childhood Memories

27:24 Listener Questions and Parenting Advice

33:02 Workplace Personas and Drinking Habits

34:18 Shoutout to Stephanie and Drinking Occasions

35:20 Tequila Talk and Drinking Preferences

38:52 Parenting and Bonding with Children

43:24 Mark's Rash and Doctor Visit

49:37 Relationship Dynamics and Arguments

50:45 Podcast Merch and Drinking Discussions

52:31 Hair Dye and Aging

01:04:46 Final Thoughts and Social Media Plugs

Transcript

0:00

Welcome back to if you Want Me to be honest with April and Cindy, this bitch and my bitch. Um, first of all, I want to talk about this drink we got today again. Where's the, there we go. Yeah, sorry. It's called what? Purple. Purple Jamaican. Purple Rain. Alright. And uh, Scotty made it for us, so. Mm-hmm. I'll show you. Mines. Tastes like Malibu. And Pineapple. Pineapple. Yep. That's a baby back bitch drink. But tastes good. I don't think it's as strong as the drink last time. Woo. That other drink was strong. Just so you all know. Good though. We're gonna turn this podcast into an alcoholic. An alcoholic? No, not an aa. Sorry, I'm talking about alcoholics named. Yes, that's us too. Because, um, I'm starting to drink a lot now because I'm gonna do this podcast every time I do it. I have a drink or two, but I could tell you that, um, they're pretty good though. Mm-hmm. So I wanna start off today is, um, a day that, um, my buddy didn't know that I was gonna say this, but today is her mom's birthday. Oh boy. Um, so I just want you to know that, oh my God, reason why you're sick. She's gone through a lot of things emotional. So, um, we are gonna talk about up. Shit. Drink up bitch. The fact that she was an amazing woman, um, I will just say this, that I want you to know. She accepted everybody into her life and was so good to my daughter Gabby, and always said that that was her granddaughter. Which was funny'cause she was in every, she's my daughter. That's why Mowgli was raised by her pretty much. So I just wanted to say happy birthday in heaven to you, mama. Happy birthday. Um, also, we've lost a few, um, celebrities recently, which is very. Sad. Yep. Um, we lost, uh, brother. Yeah. Yeah. We, we lost, um, Ozzy this week. Ozzy, we, uh, we lost, uh, Malcolm Warner, which was on the Cosby Show. Yeah. We grew up watching him. Oh my God. Yeah. Yeah. Super funny. Sad stuff this week, that's for sure. Yeah. So it's been a very overwhelming week, but that's why we going to self-medicate. As we say, we're not therapists, but my therapist, which is me, says to drink up bitch. And that's the problem, whatever. I mean, if you've seen that episode of the algorithm is my therapist. Mm-hmm. They keep sending me drinks and Scott keeps making them, dude. So I'm gonna be a, a drunk by the time we're done, whatever. By the way, she, her hair looks beautiful. It's new. It took her 65 hours, but it's fine. It's okay. I had a lot of work done to it. So in case y'all are wondering, I like it. I like it looks nice. I go to a great salon. My girl there, her name's Lisa. I love her. She did a great job. Can I just tell you, this chick Lisa is very calm. Oh, very quiet. I need to be her. Like even when she talks to me sometimes she'll be blow drying my hair and she's telling me something and I'm like, I can't fucking hear you. I'm going, oh, Uhhuh, really? And I'm looking in the mirror trying to read her lips. Who knows what I've agreed to. Great. Or told her she was right. Lisa, I'm gonna tell you now, if you listening, girl, try not to talk to me when I'm like, got the hair dryer on, or talk louder. Well, yeah, that too, but you know. But no, she. I relax, dude. It's like getting a massage for me. Oh, maybe I need to go get my hair. Did you? Well, I mean, them fucking grays is still there. Ain't, Hey, I like easy grays, love gray. I like, I think they're cute. They're, they're lovely. Some people try to hide it. I do not. I, oh, I hide it. I'm just not bougie, so I don't cares why it's not about being bje. Well, when you go spend six hours at a hair salon. Pretty much I got the hair dye out four and a half. Calm down. Oh my God. I can't imagine. Oh my God, it's so relaxing. I'm four and a half hours. I better be at a pool with some alcohol. Yeah, well I'll tell ya, I might start bringing my own little nip nips water. I think they do have get like champagne and wine there. Yeah, but I've never had it'cause I go so early. Well, and not only that, if you're there four and a half hours, you'll be drunk on to get home. Especially me. Well, I, I made Scott come pick me up. Smart. Smart. Because I'm bougie Smart. Um, also I wanna talk about how many times April. And I. And I, okay. Say yeah, right? Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Right. Yeah. Right. We know people keep telling us, we say it a lot, we can't help it, and we ain't fixing it. We're not professionals here. It just, it is what it is. Well, I mean, we're semi pros now really. We're in our JV season. Yeah. I mean, for those of you who listen to sports, we would technically be on the JV squad. Okay. Well. We're gonna be at JV for a while. Okay, well y'all think that, but listen. Yeah, but then we gotta watch what we say. We can't say Mm. Right? Mm-hmm. Right. We can't talk about people of all. We complain. Doing all that of I, I talked about, you know, it's been a while since I had to do a lot of edit. Imagine if I had to edit out. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. It would be broke up every second. Dude, y'all wouldn't even have an episode. Exactly. So you're welcome. Anyhow, it's the weekend. I'm gonna go to the springs tomorrow, we gotta turn the spam on people. Listen, I say something Meuse. Yeah, it ain't plugged in. God dammit. Um, I'm going to the Springs tomorrow with some of my family. Good luck with that. Yep. It's gonna be fun. It is ice cold. The water is so cold. It's, yeah, but hey, but when you're done though, you feel amazing. And it's hot as balls here. Yeah. It's like 110. I think that's why it feels a lot colder. Yeah. Because you do it in winter, it's warm. It's like, you know. Yeah. Yeah. I'm not that bad. So that's what I'm doing Saturday and then Sunday, Brina's getting baptized. Mm. Mm-hmm. Jesus Lord, help us. Thank God. Amen. Yeah, she, she's supposed to, unless we can't get her up, she's supposed to Lord not to. And then when she's done, I'm gonna go to, um, I. Oh shit. I think it's funny'cause I'm just saying it. I'm going to go to my friend Kim's house and have some drinks at her pool, her and Paul with or with. April. So I'll bring snack. We're fine. Be good. Whatever. Do you boo? Yeah. So I'll see you guys there. My, yeah. My family's coming into town. I probably won't even be there. Oh, shit. Fine. Mm-hmm. So all good. That's what I'm doing. What are you doing? There we go. Well, let's first talk about last weekend for a minute. Okay. Anniversary weekend. Okay. Was nothing for you. Well, I just did it. We went out to dinner. That's nice. We went on that little ferry that took us to the fort. Oh yeah. Did that. That was cute. That's neat. It was so hot out though. Yeah. I'd like to the winter, I'm surprised. Get ferry up and running again.'cause it's been a couple years that that hasn't really, yes. Now you tell me. Now I tried. Oh. Oh. Had you told me? Yes. It's not Tuesdays and Wednesdays just Okay. Thursday through Monday. Yeah. Yeah. It was always on the weekend that we tried. It's, it was nice. It's free too. Yeah, it's pretty cool. But I, I like to go in the winter time so I can really. Enjoy it more.'cause it was like 110. Yeah. Then we went out to a late lunch and then we went to a later dinner. Nice. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Right. What'd you do? We were in Georgia. Mm-hmm. For, um, anniversary. Mm-hmm. Just so you know, there's gonna be a lot of that this time. Okay. We're trying not to, we're trying not to suggest that you all start doing a drinking game. Yes. Hey, we're trying to help you. Yes. I'm join it every time somebody says mm-hmm. Yeah. Mm. Right. Take a drink. Maybe we will too, join you, but anyway, we'll be wasted. Yeah. So, um, we were in Georgia. We went for CHOP anniversary. That is a friend of Kim and Paul's, which is also a friend of mine in Scott's. But we met him through them, um, his birthday weekend. Mm-hmm. His birthday actually. Okay. His birthday actually drink up. Oh shit. You did it. Um, God dangit. I can, his birthday was actually, it's actually on my anniversary day. Oh, right. July 17th. Boy, in case y all wanted to know that once, send the me some gifts. Okay. Um, but yeah, so, so y'all celebrated, went up there and, and hung out in Georgia. Lemme tell you, there are some freaks in Georgia. Okay. Really? I heard some stories about chopper. Oh, well Chopper, when he was younger, I'm sure Paul got the same stories. Mm-hmm. These are worse. I thought maybe he would too. Oh yeah. You know how you can hear the Choocho train run through this area in our neck of the woods? Yep. He ran the train. Whoa. Oh, exactly. That's what I said. What the. Who the, I don't want to hear that story. Yeah. Really? Mm. Chopper. Dang disappointed. So sad. But he was a baby then. Hey. I mean, he knew stupid shit. When you're young, he, yeah. Well, to be expected. Mm-hmm. But anyway, I'm gonna have to drink up alcohol. Sorry. One, maybe it's me that does the, mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Right. Anyway, so that was one of the things that I learned while I was in Georgia. Wow. I thought it would be that to yourself. Great. To bring back to you, if you want me to be honest. I wanted to see your real reaction. Yeah, that's rough for a week now. I've had to hear Paul and Scott do Don't close your eyes. Oh, it's an old country song. They heard that in Georgia. Well chop it's CHOP's favorite, like karaoke go-to song. Oh, okay. And it was one of his dad's favorite songs, so that Oh, okay. You know, that's sweet. But you know, Paul and Scott, they won't let it go, dude. They say one hear, one little line. It's, it's, it's done. It's done. It's been a week. Oh, this. He is gonna take months until they find something else. I know. Well, Scott, sorry. Thank God is onto the whole Biden. Stumbling. Oh, bumbling. Get, get, get. So it moved. It moved. So thank God he is moved on to that until they hear this podcast and it's gonna restart it up. Dude, good job. Don't close your eyes. But anyway, other than that, we had a great time. Really good. I mean, it was good. The people at the VFW were amazing. They always are. They're very nice. Um, and we dressed up like rednecks that were going to country folk Hawaiian and Luau girl country folk. It was fun. So we had a good time. Good. And you come back Sunday? Yeah, we came back on Sunday this weekend. I got family coming into town, like I said. Um, which is exciting. Who don't you? Who's coming into town? My family. Your brother Met, met. He's come, he's coming this weekend. My brother's coming with his wife and so we stand for a couple weeks or whatever. Yeah, about two weeks. Yeah, they'll be here. Gotcha. So that'll be fun. Um, it's always fun to. Get stupid like when we, well, he might meet me Sunday at Kim and Paul. Mm-hmm. He's already probably seent your ass. Um, but yeah, it'll be fun. So. Okay. Well that's all I have planned right now. Hmm. Okay, good. That's good. What else you got? Um, two weeks we're supposed to go see Hayden, which is my granddaughter. Mm-hmm. Um, we're supposed to go see her in a couple weeks. I can't wait. That you're ditching my grandson's birthday for Yeah, you're welcome, Hayden and Nathan. Yeah, I'm ditching, uh, poor little Winnie. Yeah, that's all right. Just make sure you drop off a gift. I know. I gotta give the best gift now. Thanks, Nathan. Yeah, that's costly. And Nathan, I expect a gift too now. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Since you're taking my best friend. Shoot, I said it again. Mm-hmm. So it's my fault. It's always a hundred percent. I'm gonna count them. Wait, went down the wrong tube. She choking. She choking. Who? First of all, if they didn't point this out, I wouldn't notice it. So what the hell? Mm-hmm. Um, just so you know, why'd they point it out? Well, everybody I talk to points it out. Well, they're rude. Well, you know the running joke with Scott, Zach, and Brandon because my boys and my husband are assholes. And they like to purposely point out your flaws. They're funny. Do they wanna do, they want us to go for theirs. This is why I'm, why y always say I'm a bitch. Okay. Yeah. Because I got no problem telling somebody either. But for years they say Kim and I when we're on the phone, okay. They know exactly who we're talking to because all they hear is mm-hmm. Yeah. Right. So it's you and Kim, not me. I think I, it's kind of like when you have poison ivy. Oh, you itched. I think I rubbed it off on you. Pretty much. Yeah. I mean, it had to eventually happen with the fact that we've been friends this long. Yeah, dude. Huh? Get all of her scratches. I'm sorry. Excuse me. I have to interrupt. Why Zach? This child's on the phone. Oh, Zach. Now lemme forewarn him. He's on the podcast. It's illegal not to. Hi Zach. Welcome to the podcast. If you want me to be honest. You're on live. Are you really? Yep. Yes we are. Thank you for the call in. How can we help you, Wow, that's getting edited. Um, I'll be back. I'm pausing. Thank you. Okay, well, we took the call from Zach and, um, if you've ever seen the TikTok live, you'll know that um, he, we had to cut him out of this. Yeah, yeah, he got cut. He's a little too much for this episode. Yeah. So all the cuts that we were talking about that we're trying not to make anymore. Well, thank you Zach. Yeah. Done. Screwed it up. Thanks. Any who? Any who? Um, so what else are we talking about? I said, um, drink up. Oh boy. Hopefully it'll get less and less. Ah. Mm-hmm. That's pretty good. Drink, actually. Like a little, um, taste like a grape Jolly Rancher. Mm-hmm. Or a grape Gatorade. And you know, we're from the great state of Florida. Yep. I like it. Gatorade was invented. It was good. This just kind of making me look fat. Maybe it's the chair. I think it's the chair. You blaming the chair. You got jokes today. I, you can't even see my fucking chair, so I dunno what you're bitch about. At least you can see yours. You can't see mine either until I turn sideways. You can, dude, because I turned it sideways. Look at me Barely. God, this is supposed to be fat girl etiquette. Sorry, this ain't, this ain't cutting it. And I lost two pounds. We need to get a humongous chairs so it looks like we're skinny. So we look tiny. Yes. I love that idea. Yes. So we, we'll wear black shirts and then put like big giant white chairs Yes. Behind us, so that way it makes us look real. Zoom us. Right. Thank you. Funny. I'm funny. Okay. All right. So we're gonna go see Hayden. That's it. Um, that's gonna be fun'cause I haven't had a break in a while. So, since Puerto Rico last year. Yeah. That'll be a nice little getaway. Yes. I need a couple nice away and a quickie. Saw we, she ain't had one of them in a long time too. Hey, that's all I have. I'm 52. You gotta get as quick as you can. Just jk. Jk. What? Dude? I told you some family, some friends, some acquaintances might not like this. And just keep listening or at least download it. Yes. So I might You'll love it, but you gotta like it. Yeah. Rude. If you don't. I know. Um, so my son was working today. And he works, you know, on the streets. Not on the streets, but on the streets. He's a street worker. Just like Brandon. Brandon's a street worker. Exactly. Um, so they were fixing pipes and stuff on the, in the street. So I guess there was a high speed chase. Oh yes. Which they didn't see it coming'cause it came so fast. Mm-hmm. While they're all standing there by the stop sign, the guy hit the stop sign, why they're near it and took off and the cop kept chasing off. Nathan said, I own this. I didn't give a shit about anybody on the side. Nope. Like, are y'all okay? Nope. They kept going. Kept chasing, knocked the stop sign down on mate. Kay. Nathan. Nobody's got taken out. Nathan sent me a picture of the stop sign. Yeah. And said, yeah. And his truck, that's besides, was it his work truck or his new, his real truck work. It's work. Yeah. Well fuck that piece of shit. Well, I'm talking about he was there. I don't care about, I don't care about any truck. His truck, their truck. Anyway. So Brina said, why would he show us this? He knows we have anxiety, but yeah, thank God, especially about, probably I almost died today. I deal with that with Brandon too. But you know how I find out Brandon has an incident? Incident? Yeah. She drank too much already. His girlfriend one eye. When and one eye starts going, I say, you know. Um, Alex? No. Well, that bitch will kill his ass too, but no, um, no. He's on TikTok live and he says it and he starts talking about what happened at work today. So, you know what he tells me? Well, he tells the world Yeah, on TikTok. He said, um, that he was on the job and some crack head stole another guy on the job site's backpack. Took off running with it or on a bike. Now what that mean may have this story wrong. Not all the way wrong, but some details. Yeah. Okay. Minor. He was on a bike or he was running, whichever. Okay. But he took off and Brandon chased after him. Of course Brandon chased after him. Let him go. Dude, I told you in the last episode, did catch him. Episode him. He did. Oh my God. And he said, Hey. Crack head. That ain't your bag. What the hell? And the crack head pulled a pipe out of his shut up pocket, put it in his mouth, and lit that crack and smoked. And so he let go of the backpack? No. And then tossed the backpack to Brandon took off. I said, Brandon, you're a superhero. A crack head stopping superhero. I mean, I'm proud of you, but yeah. Can you believe that? I said it had to have been Jack's dude like. Of course it's only Jax. Does that shit happen? That's where Nathan just almost got hit. That's what I'm saying. Crazy ass people dude. Yep. Well that's scary. Yeah, of course. Brandon chases'em. I don't want my kids chasing nobody. Brandon and Nate though are the two that, that kind of shit would happen to. Of course. Why wouldn't it be? Yeah. No big deal. Yeah. Go on with your lives the most calmest la Well, I mean, brand has his snap out moments. Yeah. But you know what I mean, like the most chillest kind of guys. Yeah. These are the ones that end up having the crazy shit happen. Of course. Why wouldn't it be? Mm-hmm. Uhoh, God dang it, right? Mm-hmm. I'm gonna have to add that to Andrew's. Sound the best things that I need him to put in our intro. That's true. Because if we say it that much, we should have thought I didn't know. Obviously. That should be the whole thing. I'm gonna put a beat too. Uhhuh. Mm-hmm. Right. Yeah. We gonna make our own beats. That's right. Bitches. Right, right. Mm-hmm. Okay. Okay. Back. Let's get serious. Let's get serious. Serious. Alright. You were saying something about. So my family's coming into town. Yep. Yep. And that is so much fun. And um, what I wanted to actually talk about was a little bit about family. Okay. Okay. Now, especially young kids do young kids say the most craziest shit? Right. Okay. Don't you think? Yeah, of course. There a lot of people say, oh, they're the most truthful. They're the most hurtful. Yeah. Yes. Let me be real. Okay. If you've got a mouthy ass kid that will just say it like it is, get'em on this show. We'll have a seat right here. That's right. We'd be like, okay. We want you to be honest. Um, but for real, like my grandson now, you can only imagine who he's raised around. Okay. Wow. And I don't appreciate Mowgli's. Raising judgments. No judgment. Okay. Okay. We listen and we don't judge jeez that goes to you, viewers. So my grandson likes to tell me all the time when I do stuff, his first reaction is, what the hell? But I said, let Mimi play your game with you'cause he got this new, um, it's kind of like, what's that game called? Um, the, we. It's kind of like the we, but it doesn't have controllers where you can like throw it into the TV and stuff like that. Yeah. You know that you gotta hold onto, did I say Yeah. Yeah. Dang it. So anyway, um, God dang it. I hate this shit. I, I'm gonna tell you something. Those of you that have said something, you're rude. This is a problem and I didn't ask you to be honest okay? About that. We said we were gonna be honest. We didn't ask you. This is about us. And I appreciate y'all keeping your shit to yourselves. Okay. Anyway, I'm not even gonna focus on it now. Okay? Okay. So it's this setup that's like the, we, you don't have controllers. Instead, it marks your body. Well, you can see I throw my, I'm a hand talker. I should have been Italian dude. But anyway, so I said, let me replay this game with you. And so he wants me to play. I get in there. That boy is competitive as hell. He's already a sore loser. Oh boy. All right. First of all, I was killing it, girl. There was this, there was this, you know, the old, um, what's that block game? That it's so old where the ball bounces and it goes big. Oh yeah. And you bust out blocks. I understand. I forget what it's called. And it Yeah. And it keeps bunking off of stuff. Yep. And you gotta block it and stuff. So this is called Blockbuster. Okay. Is this game. So you gotta imagine your body is the board. So like you gotta slide to the left, slide to the right. Okay. Crisscross. Everybody clap your hands. That's what it's like. Okay. So without the hand clapping. So I'm doing this right, dude, I was killing it. I mean, killing it. Okay. Mind you, my grandson's almost three and he said, no, Mimi, you're done. You're done. He didn't want to, you're done. He didn't want, he's tired of your ass. He did not like me beating his high score. Yeah. And I said, I'm not done yet. Let me do this. So I keep going and finally I clear the board and he goes, my turn, I, you're done. I'm like, what the hell, dude? You won't even let me play. No. Nope. He's so competitive. Aw. He cannot stand that. Well, yeah, that's kind of good. He, he's so funny because. I have a nephew when he was younger. Mm-hmm. When he was a baby. They're all grown now. Mm-hmm. When he, he was younger, he used to, everything was me. So instead of like, oh, I'm gonna do this, he said, me do this, me got this. Right. So Winston calls YouTube, me, YouTube. Because I always, always, it's all about him. Damn, I'm raising a narcissist. Pretty much. Good luck with that. I guess he takes after his Mimi anyway, so he calls it me tube. Okay. So every time he wants to get on something, he says Snapchat.'cause he loves Snapchat. Mm-hmm. Um, but yeah, he, he, so he calls it me tube. Well, every time he does it, it reminds me of my nephew. And my nephew. When he was younger, he got, had to get his. Not had to. He got a haircut and they shaved all his hair off. Okay. Okay. And I'm not gonna name my nephew. Okay. I have a couple so y'all can try and figure it out. But that nephew knows who the hell I'm talking about because he's heard this story for years. And he said, he was told, oh yeah, your haircut looks good. Good. It looks good buddy. And he said, no. Me look like Dick. I can tell you that when he was, that was like the most favorite thing we would visit or hang out together. Everything was me, me got this, me do this. Yeah. Yeah. Me. No, me do this, not you. Anyway, so I thought that was funny. It reminds me of like when Nathan was younger. Her? Yes. And what he used to call Scott. Oh my God, dude. Yeah. That, uh, mark used to make him purposely say, Scott, I know. He's like, who do you wanna go see Cock? Who do you want to, what do you want to go? You wanna go to April? And who's Cock? And Mark would make him say, over, all the time, because he was little and he couldn't say Scott, so he said, cock. I still call him cock too. Don't feel bad. It was, it was funny. I'm like, Hey cock, come on. Get over here. We, we still laugh about that. Yeah. He used to call, uh, when it's lightning. He said lightning. Lightning, lightning. Yes. Mail. Mail. He used to call the mailman mail. Mel's here, mails here's, that's the cutest age, I think is like between two when they're learning and, and four, yeah. After four, they become complete smart asses. Yeah. They're gonna tell you how to run your life, what to do, and they do it for the rest of their lives. They're still doing it. Still doing it now. Yeah. Well, especially yours. I got a 21-year-old that tries to tell me how to run my life. She does. I mean, he does. My bad whoopsies. Well, yeah, I think that goes into a little bit of, you know, we had that, um, viewer, that fan, or I don't know what you would call it. Listener. Yes. Listen, watcher, stalker, um, that emailed us about, um, he was from the uk. Oh yeah, I told you about it. Yeah. And he wanted to know about raising babies and, and what to do and how to do this and how to do that questions. What the fuck are you asking us for? Let's be real. I mean, because we're perfectly great parents, obviously, and this is what I'm thinking. He's listening to Maybe he never heard our podcast. Okay, that's not true because I double checked all his shit. Listen, I'm like a private investigator, okay? Oh, here she goes. Can't get no shit past me. And I checked all our analytics, all of our stuff shows that we have a viewer in the uk. So if we have somebody from there, I have to assume the email. Came from an actual person there. Yeah. It's not like somebody emailed me and said, Hey, I am in the UK and we have no listeners in the uk. Yeah, that's true. You know what I mean? Right now we've got people in, um, Calgary, Canada. What the heck? Alberta, Calgary, all. I think that's Canada. Okay, so something you gonna find out about me People, if you want me to be honest, I'm dumb as shit when it comes to geography. Dude! Uh, I never, I don't, so I can't help you out. Huh? Did you say Calvary? No. Calgary. What'd you say? Calgary. Calgary, Alberta. You know what that means? You know what that sounds like. I should Google that shit. Calgary sounds like the Calvary Christian Church. No, no, that's Calgary. Um. The calgorithm you told me about. Oh my fuck, what is it called? Just imagine me of that. Hold on. Algorithm, algorithm. Algorithm. Well, whatever it reminded me of that she thinking this is like redneck calgorithm cow. So tipping, you'll know. Find out that I suck at geography. Great at math. Um, Cindy sucks at English. This is, I do make up my own words. You see that little TikTok I sent you? That little ticky tacky that I was talking about. I make up my own words. I just send it to you. Yeah. And Stephanie, you don't watch more stuff. Wasn't it a TikTok? Yeah, fine. It's fine. Stephanie laughed at it. Thanks Stephanie. My bestie. We talked about that bitch too. Next. Keep up. She about bestie. You seen that TikTok? We gonna do that too? Yeah. I'm gonna post that next where it says. Your best friend's over there calling you. Oh yeah. See a lot of, and then as soon as you start going, they grab you by the hair and yank you down. Yeah. Like what the hell? That's gonna be me. Ours is gonna be, I'm gonna have your eyes blackened out. Yeah. How you like that shit? I like it. I buy drinks. But, so anyway, I was talking about our listener. From the uk'cause we like to run around in circles'cause we probably,'cause we talk about our kids so much. They think we're professionals, but our kids are fucked up. So I don't know why they think we are professionals. Well, I mean, they're not in jail yet. All me. Yeah. Hey, I'm just saying. You gotta leave for, you gotta leave room for listen, percentage wise, there's six of'em between you and me and none of'em been to jail. Right. Yay. I'm gonna tell you, there's probably a statistic that says one out of 10. Yeah, that's true. One out of five, one out six. No, but honestly, I I, I feel like we raised amazing kids. Yeah. They're even though in the jungle, we just talk shit about'em. That's all. Yeah. Fuck their ass. I don't got shit. I don't care either. Just like our husband talking, you think we don't love them? We wouldn't have been with'em this long. Come on, dude. But they do get all my damn nerve. Ain't that the truth about life in general? I was telling Mark the other day sitting at a table, this is men, okay? Mm-hmm. Me. And this guy wants to know about raising kids and how to bond with his baby. Mm. You see this? We don't care. Mm-hmm. Not us, generally. Us women. Yeah. My husband, I don't give a shit if you bonded with them kids. Yeah. As long as we did come in. Yeah. So the guy from the UK was asking us, you know. What, what's the best book to read the Bible? That's the best book otherwise for everybody. All you listeners, there's age appropriate stuff for age appropriate people. Now, I think you should read the Bible to the baby in the belly. I mean, you could. That'd be great. Yeah. He'll, he'll Or she'll recognize your voice at least. Yeah, they say put like, um, uh, Beethoven and Bach like on headphones and it causes a calm kid. Listen, I'm gonna tell you something about this world. We need a bunch of crazy kids, okay? They won't survive. Not if they're good kids, not if they're like, they got good hearts. It's hard. That's what I'm saying, to live in this world with, with a good heart. Oh, I know. But some of them that have hearts, they feel way too much. Yeah. Like thicken up, toughen up. I ain't got time for that shit. Okay. I agree. Some, sometimes you gotta, I have a good heart and I'm still a bitch. Oh my God. She picks on me all the time and I don't what? Deja, hallelujah. Oh, you just actually admit that. Oh. Said I'm a bitch. You're a bitch. You catch everything. You're annoying as shit. Fuck yeah, because I, wait, bitch, this is, this is the shit I wait for. She sits like a panther. Yeah. I'm sick in the head is why? I'm like, let it fuck up. You're petty. You say, I'm petty. You're the petty one. That's why I had that shirt made. Um, now what was I saying before you rudely interrupted again. Okay. I have a good heart and I'm a bitch. Yes, you, I'm really only a bitch at work. You think? Yeah, other, if I'm not at work, I'm not a bitch. And they all, we could have Mark on here. I think he might. I wish he would. I wish he would, was saying, dude, I'm the best wife he'll ever have. That's the only one, two little died. The best and the only so, well, I don't know. I think obvious. What? You don't know what, what, what did I stumble? What part didn't you get? What you don't know? I mean, no, I, I not saying I don't, I don't know about that. I meant like, I don't know. I think that, um, you know, it's okay to be sensitive. Well, of course, and a certain degree, but, but I think you also have to be mother. Budging. Honest. I'm trying to watch my cussing lately. Good job. You're doing a great job. You know, I probably, as many times as I've cussed, I've probably said mm-hmm. Yeah, I'm right. You know what the problem is though, the last few episodes we've been drinking, so it's harder. Okay. Let's talk about that because I know Stephanie, I know you're out there listening. Okay. And watching and liking. Don't talk about my best. and following. Okay. Okay. Let me do, she's talking shit. Yeah. She's like, let me shut up. Um, this goes out to my best friend Stephanie. Mm-hmm. Which is really her best friend. Um, we do drink a lot. No, I don't actually, I drink on occasion. This is an occasion. I do drink on occasion. Okay. On daily occasion, I would like people to answer this. Okay. So you're not daily occasion. Now we weekly occasion. It used to be, um, when did we start this podcast? Two months ago. And a half. Okay, so take out the two and a half months. Eight episodes. Four out of'em. We had one drink. One. One, yeah. Which I almost need another one, so I know. I'm thinking it's going down too good like Gatorade. You sure there's any alcohol on this? I can taste it. You can? And I can feel it. Oh, I don't feel it. One bet I'm a fricking because you drink more on occasion than I do. Yesterday was National Tequila Day. I didn't drink no tequila, anything. I did not drink tequila. I did. I got the expensive shit I made Scott. Buy two for one. I mean, not two for one, two for one, buy, two for$38 because you're bougie of classic shots. Classica, caa. Why would you do shots? Why not have a like, I mean, I sip the second one. Yeah, but the shot goes down way easier. Dude. I ain't got time. I need to kick it and hit it. I don't like tequila at all. I don't like margaritas. I don't like, have you had the fancy, I don't care what it is, blue and white from the Housewives. I don't care what it is. That's what you had that bougie ass shit. God dang right. I did. I got my bougie ass hair done and had some bougie ass tequila rich people. That's not rich people. You know what I did? Well, you know what I had yesterday. What did I have? Oh, I went to. I had, oh, I had a sandwich from Dominic's yesterday for my lunch. Did I finish my conversation? I don't know what you were talking about. That's bullshit. You were talking about what? The UK people? No, first of all, this bitch, Stephanie. Oh, back to professional drinkers and alcohol. I'm sorry, Stephanie. I can't control it. I am the one who is shoving it down her throat. Y'all don't like it. First of all, before we started the podcast, I did drink on occasion. Don't you think? Is that okay? This is my question and somebody can email us whatever they want to do, just to help me. No know if it's you, Stephanie. No. You leave my friend alone. So I think occasion is, okay. So during holidays, 4th of July. Mm-hmm. Uh, Memorial Day, labor Day, Yamkipper, new Year's Eve, Hanukkah, no New Year's Eve Flag Day, and sometimes Halloween. So if you drink them five times a year and you may have one drink with dinner in between, that ain't that occasion. I mean, you're definitely an occasion. I think I drink way more than you ever. Yeah, for sure. Yeah. Can Scott reach over and give us more? True. Can you want, Hey, you want me to text him? Babe? Can we get another, I need him to make a pitcher. Yeah. This is only gonna get worse. I'm just, well, if its we continue drinking. If it's these, we need a pitcher. That one drink last time was not. I'm gonna text. We only need one of those. Watch this. I'm gonna go ahead and send this out. What you keep, the conversation you gonna do is say, bring a pitcher in here. Hey babe. Anyway, can we get another, I think that's on occasion. I'm gonna tell you this, I, that's me. Curse me. And some people think that's a lot. So, hey, I don't know. Well, I'm gonna tell you this. We've been on air Okay. For about, well, 23 minutes on this one, but we did, I don't know if it continued from the point where I cut Zach out. It didn't. You're gonna have to add, you think it's a new recording? Yes, I saw. Saw it. I think it said start recording again. No. Anyway. No, that's gonna get edited out. Um, if that's the case, we've only been on for about 30 minutes. Yep. And you have downed an entire drink. But this was weak. Goes down, slowly, smooth. The other one was so strong. It was good, but strong, so I slowly sipped on it. And our glasses last time were way bigger than this. It was the, it was the Tortuga thick one. Oh yeah, the Big Mac. You gimme a baby drink. Sorry, Jacobs. You get a baby back bitch attitude. Exactly. Um, well, I don't know. I don't know. Anyway, back to the original conversation that she has now dodged 50 times because I said about children. I, I went back to it. Okay. Children and are you UK, listener? Yeah, I went back to it and you skipped it to Stephanie. Well that's because that's what I do. Okay. Um. They wanted to know the book was the Bible. Yep. The bonding during the, um, tummy time. I don't You don't get that? Yeah, I don't, I mean, they're in his stomach. They don't, they can hear you. They can feel like vibrations of something, but. I think they're like in there like, knock, knock, knock. Shut the fuck up. You're loud out there. Yes, exactly. You know what I mean? When you, when the mom feels the baby move around, it's because they don't like you. Yes. Not the mom, the daddy. But also they said when the dad. When the baby comes, how can a dad bond be there? Feed the baby, change the baby, be there when it's sick, hold it. Don't be a deadbeat dad. Yeah. Be there constantly. Just like the mother would be as much as possible. I know, you know, dad's work and whatever, but play with the baby a lot, blah, blah, blah. That's what bonds, that's what bonds. Wow. So that's the only bonding, like I say, be take part in, uh, um, raising the kid and don't put it all on the mom. And if you really wanna know the truth. Ask a child therapist. Yeah, you're asking all peoples that Fucking raised a couple of kids. That honestly turned out amazing. But yeah, but there's things I would change. Oh, I, there's no perfect parent. I didn't. That's about it. Well, no, I wouldn't beat my kids more. They were, you didn't great. Give him enough. They, oh, Nathan was a good kid. So was Gina. Spare the rod, spoil the child. It's in the Bible. But they were pretty good kids. It's once they become older. I'm glad you said that. Adults spare the rod, spoil the child. Yeah, it's in the Bible. Then why do you always bitch about the fact that I spoil the shit outta my kids now? Do you know what that means? No, obviously not. And I gotta, it means beat your kids ass so you don't spoil, so they're not spoiled. Spare the rod. Means put the rod away. No, no. And spoil the child. No, no. It means take the rod and shove it in their ass. That, no, that's what that means. No, it just means like, don't spoil your child. Be strict. You're the parent. Don't, uh, don't. Um, like this generation dude, parents are, uh, soft, what's that called? Soft parenting or some shit. Helicopter dumb. Well, I done that. That's dumb. Still are like, be normal. If they don't like the rules, you got to 18 and get the fuck out. That's all I got to say. Well, but they won't leave some You have to remove. Yeah. Yes. So I just, um, yeah, I would just go with your gut. Mine just want to leave. See this is you don't, don't. Mine are like, we're 18. We were trying to leave when we were 16. How is it that you're not allowing us to leave until we're 18? Well, Brina says she's still in college. That's why she's still there. I don't give a shit. I owe her something. I'm just telling you, my kids were dying to get the hell out from under us. I was too. And isn't that weird? Because everybody, well, it was the jungle. I the jungle. Let the kids do everything. Like you had free reign. Why would you not wanna be here now? They all wanna come back now. And I'm like, hell no. Mama's door's closed. We're good. We're good. Shit. I might be moving into your house next. Oh my God. This is barn door just wide open. Come open and shut. Come in open and shut. Hey, why not? It's my turn. I mean, you're entitled. You do. I feel like you putt enough time. You got that shit right. Yeah. I'm gonna make that as like when we divvy up payment. That's your payment. You know you ain't bougie, usually don't need much. You got that right? I take you to Culver's every once in a while Culver's Give a little burger. A little Longhorn. Hey, we didn't eat Culver's today. No we didn't. Firehouse sub. Yay. We changed it up. Yep. It was pretty good too. Yeah. Hooking liner. I like the firehouse Sub subs. Sub subs. Sub, sub, sub. Yeah, it's pretty good. Yeah. Anywho. So yeah. So tell me about, um, mark's little, um, rashy rash. Oh, okay. Let's talk about rash ash fish. Okay. Yeah. What happened when you got to the docks? So, because Mark works outside and it's 110 degrees right. He's sweating like crazy, like, oh, hold on. The bartenders here. Oh shit. We need that. There you go. Oh yeah. Thank you sir. I appreciate you. Thank you. Scotty in for the refill. You got another one too. Thank you, sir. Thank you. Thank you. Hey bartender. Thank you buddy. Thanks babe. Got a new one, guys doing. Hold on, I gotta scooch near you. Yeah. Scooch in. Scooch in. Come share. Woo. Got your ass. O. All of a sudden it ain't the same. He added a little extra. Or ours is watered down here and that. Oh, that was, that's strong. I mean, yours is so strong. It looks blue and not purple. Let's see. Oh shit. It looks blue on there. That's a lot of blue. AKA kaka, Kaka. Case the Caco. Mm mm-hmm. He went heavily heaven heavy. Let's see if it's happy hour. Mine is Happy hour. Well, that make me happy. That's so buy one, get one free. That ain't no, it's strong. That one's strong. Is it to you? No, it's fine. Are you scared, baby, back bitch?'cause I don't drink, drink on occasion. Now see for me, I drink every she te yesterday, so this ain't strong to her. Okay. But. Paul is home. We drink for two months straight. Great. I do, Scott drinks 12 months straight. I drink two months on, two months off, two months on, two months off. Got it. So help that that works. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You gotta filter it. Anyway, we're talking about, um, okay, so Mark works. Oh yeah. And it's 110 degrees outside. So every summer, you know, he sweats like crazy. So every summer right at his belt line, he'll get like a little rash there and it itches and it burns and itches and burn. I wanted to say it, but I didn't. Not down there. Just where his belt goes. Calm down. Everybody iching and burning. You might wanna get checked. Yeah. So it's always right there. So every year he has the same little rash and on the back of his leg. Right. Just a little spot. Right. So he kinds of deals with it and just deals with it and puts stuff on it and blah, blah, blah. Well, this year it got pretty bad and I kept saying, you need to go to a doctor. You need to go to the doctor, you know, get it fixed, whatever. Get some steroid cream. I knew that's what he needed years ago. He had to go get it. But anyway, so I let him go to doctor's by himself because I usually hold his hand through everything. Yes. Because I was like, I'm going to work. So you go to the dermatologist, you're fine. Right. So he went there toughen up. Yeah. So he went there and see, he thinks stuff is funny. Okay. What kind of stone? Like if he, because I know Mark. Yeah. If he thinks it's gonna aggravate me. Right. The he loves, loves to pick you. Yes. All the stuff, you know, remember the dentist conversation. True. He thinks that's funny. So he, he, he really gets me going. Right? So he said, yeah, so she gave me some creams and whatever. Okay. He said, but. I'm gonna punch you in your face. I can picture what he's about to say. Yes, exactly. Because you said it's down here in a nace area. It's Right. Or at his, uh, belt line. Mm-hmm. In his stomach. Mm-hmm. Right. Where, and she was already there on her knees. So, so he said, you should have seen her. She got right in there. Get the, and I said, what, what do you mean? And he said she had to get down. Her head was right there looking at it. Oh my. And I just. Okay. I'm, I'm going. He's gonna get his eyes ripped out. Yes. I'm gonna kill him any second. Yeah, yeah. Okay. Jugular. And he's like, yeah, it was funny. I said, okay, was she fat? That's always our go to, dude. And he said, no. Okay. He is dumbest and he's smiling, you know, them teeth that I wanna g so rip them off. Yeah. And I said, oh, well, how old was she your age? Okay. So I said, really? He said, and then she just walked around the back of me and opened up my pants and looked at my butt, shut your fucking face. Hold on. I said, what? What? She, because she's looking around the waistline. Stop. He said, without warning, she just walked back there and went like that and went like that. And he's like, she's checking his ass up. Okay. Who's this bitch I'm going to this one time? I said, really? And he's smiling and of course Brina's there, she's. Saying, dad. Dad, you know? Yeah. Because I know she about to kill him himself. Yeah. So I cursed him out. Tried to bite him. Right. Tried to scratch him, rip his dick off. Yeah. Or at least grab it and twist it. Oh God. And he thinks he's so funny. So I'm getting hot. I don't think it's menopause this time. So he's like, yeah, I can't believe it. She was right down there. He thinks he's a regular old Captain Morgan. That's what he thinks. That's what he thinks this moment. So dude, that's what I dealt with this week. One of the many things, but yeah, that's what smart he gets. I'm good. I hope he is. I would've had to look at him and said, I hope you're itching. Does it hurt? Yeah. Does it bother you? I maybe down there. That's how you got that in the first place. That's what you got it for. No, that's why God got you it there, so nobody will go near it. Yeah. So he's been putting on his little cream and some mm-hmm. Huh? They, they gave him antibiotics too, but he's gonna wait a few days. I don't think you need anymore. But this morning he's like, did he go down some? A little bit. But he's, it's been a day and a half, like this morning, he's like, I'm still itching. I said, calm down. Like, don't, it's not gonna, it's not gonna work overnight. Give it a few try. I mean, I'm itching in places to come see me. Freaking, I'm bitching and itching, itching, bitching. So I was just like, you're fine. But he thinks he's funny. He thinks he's fine. I, I, what the hell? Yeah. Just like the dentist. Now you know why my grandson says, what the hell? Yeah. Just like the dentist when he went, I know. She said, oh, you work out. I can tell you, dude. First of all, let me just school you fucking, I gotta be honest for a minute. I can tell you work out. I'm gonna tell you something. Here's the problem I have with women, okay? Okay. Not us married women, single women. Listen closely, okay? Don't fuck with a married man. One thing I can't stand, they love to hit on married men. Why? I don't know. Because it's that catch. Just because they're married don't mean they're good. It's like the big white whale, you know, the fishermen that's always trying to chase the biggest catch. Yeah. Yeah. Lemme tell you something. They're married and most likely they're assholes. That's why they're still married. Yeah. Yeah. Because we, just because they're married don't mean they're good. Exactly we said. I mean, come on. Got your ass. You're just saying I'm gonna be honest about it as my buddy just brung me a drink. You talking shit are ain't talking about this man, talking about my shit. Poor hasn't even been on here yet and has been blasted every episode. You're sick. Welcome to my life. Don't be a dick. You won't be blasting. That's right. So what? That's, that's, that's what I dealt with. I like it. I like it. So I'm thinking about coming out with a new shirt. You see our shirts, we try to wear something of our shirts, and if anybody's interested in one of the shirts, let us know. Um, feel free. Let me know and I'll get you a discount. I know a guy or a gal, whatever. Um, but I think what it's gonna say is, I was gonna say I like my podcasts. Like, I like my martinis extra dirty. Thank you. I love it. Love it. I love it. So that's gonna be our next one, even though I don't drink martinis. Me neither. Ugh. But I heard the espresso martinis are real good. That's a lie. Who? Oh, is it? Who did you hear it from? Somebody who likes martinis, maybe. I don't know. I've had espresso martinis. I don't like'em. They're nasty. I, when my nephew, Steven was in town, he had one. He liked it, but you don't drink. And they made be like, vodka. So you would think I'd like it, but, and you like coffee, you would think, I don't like it. I don't like it. All right. Me no like it. Me no like it. Yeah. I never had one. So. You drink on occasion. You gotta drink what you like only. Okay. Unlike me, I'm an expert. Yeah. She drinks any, I think every episode we should introduce a drink you want me to get. So then the occasion is going down the drain. I mean, screw it. Because the life you live, bitch, you should drink daily. It's only once a week. So this will be your downtime, your relax. Hey, what's the blue on my napkin? Am I getting poisoned? Scott's a roofy in me. I was gonna say, might be a little roofy or flory Flory. No, it's the, it's the, it's the dye. Yes. Calm down hair dye. Yeah. This is blue. That's bluish. When you get older, your hair turns blue. I seen this lady coming out of Publix the other day. Mm-hmm. With blue hair. No. Well, she had like. It wasn't silver, it wasn't white, it was something okay, but it was like white or silverish, whatever. But it was the prettiest color and it had a very tint, like during the sun hitting it here, you could see blue a little bit. It was so, you know how they say old people get blue hair, ice blue like it was. So I said, I even said to him, uh, him, I said to Mark, you know, that guy she randomly goes to the store with? I said, I love her hair. Went up and he said, that is nice. Mm-hmm. But I almost went up to her and said, what is that? Right? What color do you call that? Did you write that recipe for me? It was so white, but had a tint. Very light tint. Yeah. Of the like the blue. Hmm. And I think that's what they say when old people to get blue hair, but she gets it. done called blue hair. You could tell it was it. There's nobody's hair like that. I told my mom when I get older, you know, I'll probably like in my seventies maybe cut it up to here. Mm-hmm. But. I'm so crazy. I might chop it all off and Oh shit. Dye purple and have some craziness. Yeah. But this is the longest I've had my color, my hair pretty much maintain the same color. Really? Yeah. You've been with this color a while since we started, before we started this podcast too. Yeah, that's true. It's probably been a good six months. Yeah, it's been a while. Yeah. I like that. Like black hair and underneath, is that deep blue or purple? Yeah. I think that's cool. But I'm too, I'm a Ws. I ain't pussy. Yep. I can't even color a regular color. She can't even get the grays colored shit. She's afraid the grays will take on the red something or purple or whatever it's gonna be. Whatever that color is. Yeah, I think what it is, what it is. I don't know, whatever. All right. So poor Ozzy. Oh, that was sad. Mm-hmm. But you know what? A few weeks before he died, when he did that concert and he's saying, mama, I'm coming home. And they showed that to, and I made fun of him in that episode. Oh my God. I feel like such a piece of shit. Nathan sent me that Mama I'm coming home song and the little, the young girl crying and it almost made me want to cry.'cause you can hear his voice cry like he's older. And I was You're a baby back bitch. Yes. I'm a wi So, um. I, and I was teared up watching it too, and now it's like, oh gosh, listen, you gotta be thick skinned like me. She has no heart, zero heart, it's gone. Yeah. Poor all I do. Only when it comes to death. I think I've been exposed so much death that. Now anything kind of, lets do tears come out. Everybody's like, you're going through menopause. You're so sensitive. Oh my, listen, I'm a hard bitch. Okay. Told you. But when it starts talking about death. Yeah. Because I've taken care of so many people and stuff like that to discuss anything in regards to that. Yeah. Breaks me. Yeah. You know? Understand. That's the one thing I understand that. Other than that I said, male, man, fuck you kids. Fuck them fucking. Fuck'em all. Fuck them all. She don't mean that she has a great heart, uh, drinko. I do mean that. I'm saying in general, like, you know. Yeah, I get it. Do you? I don't think you do. I'm a lot, I'm a lot meaner when I'm drunk though. You are like stronger. Yeah. I'm mouth as lot dude. Not I'm fond. I curse a lot. I pick on people a lot. That's you see, that's fun to you. It's fun to me. I think it's fun. It's funny to me to watch shit. Wait till we hopefully go on this work cruise. Oh boy. I'd like to know if I'm invited for that. You're invited. You're going to go. Am I? Yeah, you are. And oh, I'm gonna go'cause I'm gonna crash. That bitch. Gary's gonna paid. It's gonna be fun because, um. If they're gonna see me a little tipsy and you know me, my mouth, oh yeah, I'm gonna be rude. Well, not purposeful. Well, they think I'm rude, sober. Imagine when I'm drunk, they're screwed. That's a lie. You're such a teddy bear when you're not. Well, don't they don't think I'm a teddy bear. They think I'm a bitch at work. You're a jokey joke. That's when you're, well, I joke, but I'm serious. That's why some people can't tell what's going on when you laugh after it. I think it's funny, but that's what I'm saying. But not every time I joke is serious. Except for at work. Watch out bitches. Yeah. You've been warned, I warned. I've warned Sam before she started. I told her I am not the same person at work. Yeah, I agree. Well, so you didn't listen. That's on you. It's people with kids now. Oh my god, the kids so strong. I told you. Told you not to get married, told you not to have kids. So if you've learned anything from this podcast, here's our real opinion. Live your life. Enjoy it. You want me to be honest? Stay single. Yeah. Don't have no babies travel, have sex with as many nobody. You went too far. Oh my bad. Real life. This is why she can't be single. I, this is why God gave me a husband. Yeah. I Nobody said, do all kids okay. You went too far. I'm just trying to, I'm saying if you live, maybe because you know that's how you think single people live is why I said that. Have sex with everyone. Sure, why not? If you're not in a relationship, I know, but that don't mean you have to go have sex with everyone. You and I have different views. Dang dude. Sorry. Would we be friends if you were single? Hell no. And what would a podcast? Hell no. I'd be doing it with my bestie Stephanie. She wouldn't be a whore if she was single. Um, if we were, if I was single. I would've got Stephanie when she was single. You would've been out. Yeah, that's true. Guys would've been doing all this more Podcast whore podcast. That's right. And I'd be listening. Ew. Yeah. You'd be like nasty bitches judging. We listen and we don't judge. Mm-hmm. I'm trying to teach you this. Well keep saying it then. A lot of things I've said go in one. Yeah, it does. Why not the other, I'm sorry. Mm-hmm. You said? Mm-hmm. God dang it. I told you. Drink up bitches. Or as my husband would like to say, yulches. Yeah. All right. Well, I think it's funny, fun. You think What's funny, yulch, when he said Yeah. In case anybody knows what that is, that's, I don't know. Nice way. It's his way of calling me a bitch. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. Or something. Yeah. I thought it was a real meaning you were gonna, it's a loving, endearing. Yeah, it's, it's his way to get away with saying, oh, he don't get away with it. I hear him say it. He is saying, I'm a bitch right in my face. That's how we banter. That's like, yeah, yeah. You guys are different than me. Exciting for him.'cause if he calls me a bitch, dude. Oh yeah dude. Yeah. He better not. I remember years ago, you gonna talk to him for fucking three weeks. Wait, you got that right. I remember. You're so different than me. We are. I, I, I, I, we've said this, but I remember, um, years ago, probably 10 years ago, let's say,'cause I don't know how long, but whatever, right? It was years ago, um, me and him got into an argument and he said to me, why are you acting like a bitch? Okay. He's never even said them words to me before. That's a trigger word. So I was devastated. Mm-hmm. So I didn't talk to him. Of course. So the next day I go to work, I'm driving home and I call my friend Diane, and I'm talking to her and I said, and you didn't call me me and Mark? No. I said, me and Mark got in a fight last night. And she's like, you did. You are a bitch. He, she said, you did? And I'm like, yes. And I said, and he asked me, why are you being a bitch? And I'm crying and she's like, okay, what happened? And I'm like. He said, she's like, why are you being a bitch? Okay, so, and he said, okay, what happened? I said, I think we might get divorced. And she's like, are you kidding me? And I'm like, he's never said them words to me before. He's now called me a bitch. How long you together? Like 20 years like this happened. Few, not that long ago. Like years ago, bitch. But like, not more. Not on a regular, but he don't. He should. So I nipped that right in the bud when I got home. See, I'm gonna tell you something. I own that. I'm a bitch. I like that. I'm a bitch. That's okay. But Mark can't call me that. Oh, you can call me it. There's fucking recourse. Um, repercussions for, yeah. I didn't talk to him for that. He said, I didn't call you one. I said, don't be it. Don't act like one or you, why are you acting like one? I said it's the same thing. It is. If you curse at me while we're arguing or while we're talking. Zos. It's funny, that's funny that you like that. We don't yell and curse at each other like that. So when he said that I was traumatized, that's just stupid. That's crazy. Anyway, to me, not me. I do it on the regular. I I know that's just, but I can't not like, I'll get pissed off and I'm like, I'm not gonna fucking talk to him. And then I'll go in another room and I'm like, fuck, I gotta go ask him what's for dinner? Damn. Yeah.'cause he cooks, I gotta go talk to this motherfucker. And they're like, lemme think about it. Don't mean what do you care? Did I get fat? Go get a sandwich. What conversation have we had? Go get a sandwich. You son, this body came from eating. Okay. Yeah, but I, I went and talked to for that. I just, I got to, okay, so I go out there and I'm like, eh, all tough too, like the fuck's for dinner. And he'll go, whatever the fuck I'm making, okay. Go back in the room. I'm like. Damn, I really don't know what we're having for fucking dinner. So you did it for nothing and then I gotta have a conversation. I just let it go. Yeah. No, I don't. I ain't got time for that. I hold onto that shit until he apologizes and mm-hmm. Then I, I will be okay. Yeah. And I'm still pissed for a while. I don't think that, I mean, my help, and that's just a normal convers relationship, might not be considered a healthy relationship, but it is for me. I mean, but that's your normal. Like, oh, we've been cussing each other out the day we met. See, I'm, I'm not used to that. Yeah, no, I grew up that way. So I learned how to fight from my mama and daddy and lemme tell you. Yeah, you, you guys, my mama and daddy are ugly when it comes to that shit, dude. Yeah. My mom's throwing a ashtray. See? Oh, hell no. I'm not a thrower though. I'm not a throw, I'm a lover. I'm not. I'm, I'm not a thrower, I'm a lover. No, I'm not a thrower. I'm more of a puncher. I, I'm nothing. I'm not, I don't even to yell at me. I'm just like, is this happening? Or you, I'm, I'm a cusser, I'm a get in your face. I'm a push your buttons. Oh yeah. Kind of person. I like to act like I'm gonna beat your ass. I ain't gonna beat your ass as a man. Yeah. You know what I mean? Is what I'm talking about. Like, I like to act tough to men. Oh. Because I, I mean, I ain't scared. What you going to do hit me? You going to jail, call the po po, you're going to prison. You know what I mean? Yeah. So, but yeah, I can push, I can push a motherfucker to hit me. For sure. For sure. For sure. Dude. Like, I'm mouthy. See? Uh, I'm not, especially when I'm heated and I think I know everything and I think I know I'm right. I just, we know. I mean, oh, we know. I know. All my problems, people, it's solved. I'm perfect. I'm okay. That's why we don't get therapy. Because we know our problems. Yeah. I don't need to, we don't to confirm that shit. Yeah. What are they gonna say? Yep, you got the problem. And I'd be like, that's what my brother told me. My mother told me, my sister told me, my father told me, my husband told me. And all my kids especially. And me this bitch. Exactly. Anyway, on that note. All right guys. Well I hope you have a wonderful weekend. And there was no title to this episode. I'm gonna have to create it because this was a mish mash of shit. That's what every episode is welcome, mismatch to our lives. Click me, click. It's not the days of our lives. The minutes. Yeah, the minutes. It changes. All right, well, all right. Have a good weekend. Guys. Enjoyed, enjoyed it. Enjoyed it. Take an opportunity to follow us on YouTube. iHeartRadio, Spotify on Apple Podcast and other outlets, TikTok, of course, follow us and watch for our antics. Yeah, on there, Instagram, Facebook, and uh, like share. Tell your mama about the drama. Tell your mama about your drama. It's been fun. Bye guys. Bye.